I became an adult today.
No, not the time I moved out on my own. Not the time I lost my v-card. Nor the time I bought my first vacuum (which I still have, btw – a sweet little red Dirt Devil).
I became an adult TODAY because I found out I have a problem with my triglycerides.
Triglycerides? Another word for “fat in your body” and I’ve got a lot of it. A healthy guy my height should be between 10 – 140 mg/dl (milligrams per decilitre). Where I’m at is 273. Yeah, yikes.
The point of adulthood was further pounded in to me when my wife (another sign of adulthood, perhaps?) told me to not only watch how much orange juice I drank (sugars!) but to also avoid eating a snack so late in the night. Sure that snack was bacon that my father left over, but…
So, what’s a boy, er, man to do? Eat healthy, look good and try to beat all the other healthy bastards at doing it?
That and take a page out of Courage Wolf’s Guide to Life.